BY CHRISTINE AMEFIAM

In a modern society in which old values are disappearing, one of the most poignant losses is the death of etiquette.

People see a celebrity who does not act within the norm as iconic or cool. This is widespread among Gen Zers, but it’s actually a huge disrespect to the people who have to put up with the unruly behaviour of a single individual.

There are some unspoken etiquette rules that everybody should be aware of.

A good example is Shalom Harlow, the runway model. In a video I’ve seen, people call her iconic because, instead of following the single queue runway models tend to form, she decided to step out of the line so she could walk faster than the model in front of her. Breaking rules for a good cause can be considered iconic, but stepping in front of your colleague just because you want to be the centre of attention is simply a lack of manners.

I don’t care how famous you may be, if you are a mere mortal like the rest of us, those rules apply to you as well.

Another example of unspoken etiquette that everybody should follow is what happens when getting out of the métro. The rule is to let the passengers on the train exit first by creating space for them, and then the waiting people can enter afterwards. Even though it is clearly stated and even marked on the floors, there are still people who stand in the middle of the doors, preventing others from exiting the métro.

I understand that entering the train first to find a seat may be their priority, but by doing so they provoke anger in those who simply want to exit.

I think people who break unspoken etiquette rules show you exactly how they would like to be treated as well.

In a world where disrespect, cussing, and acting out are being “iconified,” I don’t think there will be much room left for people with good morals, unless those values become a trend, in which case everyone will try to follow them. As I always say, there is a place for everything, and the behaviours I am criticising can be justified in certain contexts.

Etiquette is not just about table manners; it is an everyday lifestyle.

Now, let me get to the real reason I’m writing about etiquette: table manners. As people have seen in the viral video of a lady eating in a restaurant, the problem was her not being able to hold a fork correctly. I remember learning that some employers, before giving a job or promotion to a candidate, will invite them out for dinner. You may ask yourself why. Well, you want a higher role but can’t hold a fork? There are small things we do without paying attention, but they can open or close doors for us. And no, etiquette is not only for rich people; even poor people have dignity and pride in who they are, regardless of their financial status.

And for those of you who don’t want to learn etiquette because it’s “an affluent thing,” think twice before embarrassing yourselves in public.

Until next time, 

Jeudi échos.